Former Yahoos Take Yahoo! Back

Happy Post-April Fools!

Yesterday, we released a press release titled, “Former Yahoos Take Yahoo! Back: WebMocha, a start-up created by former Yahoo engineers, purchases internet giant Yahoo!

It was an April Fool’s joke of course, but a few friends almost believed it. Gotcha! Hehe.

We thought the line, “Effectively immediately, the new company will be renamed WebMochahoo!.” was absurd enough to imply it was a joke, but, heh, maybe not. I’m glad to hear we danced the line of subtlety & irony well.

Writing it was a lot of fun. We had some really far-out ideas, but toned down the final copy wisely. I even searched around for PR article guidelines and looked at a few real ones about past mergers and acquisitions.

In the press release, we listed a Hiro Nakamura as our Media Relations contact, as a nod to Heroes (great first season, this season: meh). I even set up the email address motryingtopeekhuhc.ahcombewwhatareyoudoinghal@orih, in case another Heroes fan wanted to contact us. In my head, I had this whole plan to reply to each person as if I was Hiro and end each email with the exclamation, “Yata!” Alas, only one hardcore fan emailed us. (Props to you, Jason!)

We tweeted this, posted it on Facebook, and spammed a few friends and alumni lists. By the end of the day, we had a significant increase in unique visitors – more than 10,000%! Of course, our site isn’t a traffic destination and we’re not monetizing this traffic, but it’s a neat metric.

I’m not sure when we’ll take the press release down, but I figured I’d record it here for prosperity. The one on the site is better though. It has photos.

Former Yahoos Take Yahoo! Back

WebMocha, a start-up created by former Yahoo engineers, purchases internet giant Yahoo!

Sunnyvale, CA (PRWEB) April 1, 2009 — WebMocha LLC today announced it has agreed to acquire Yahoo! Inc. (Nasdaq: YHOO), a leading global Internet brand and one of the most trafficked Internet destinations worldwide.

WebMocha is a technology and web development services agency founded in 2008 by a group of former Yahoo engineers. Effectively immediately, the new company will be renamed WebMochahoo!. The new logo will be in red.

When asked why this purchase was made, WebMocha co-founder Mike Lee replied, “At this bargain basement stock price, why not?” Under the terms of the merger agreement, WebMocha will acquire all of the outstanding equity interests in Yahoo! for $18 per share, representing a premium of approximately 28% over the current stock price.

“Our first order of business,” added WebMocha co-founder George Diaz, “will be another re-org. After the initial re-org necessary for the transition, that is. Then we’ll have meetings about meetings.” Indeed, Yahoo! has lost numerous employees and executives in the last year, both from attrition and corporate reorganizations. In that time, executives Carol Bartz and Elisa Steele joined as Chief Executive Officer and Chief Marketing Officer, respectively, after Yahoo! co-founder Jerry Yang stepped down from the CEO position in November, 2008.

WebMocha executives will be enacting changes to raise morale and streamline productivity while a deep analysis of now WebMochahoo!’s business model takes place. This analysis will culminate into a 100 Day Plan that will be delivered in exactly one hundred days, give or take a few.

This step is just the first in a series of major acquisitions WebMocha will be making this year. Many others are also in the works. Webmoogle? Microcha? Webay? Facemocha? Webazon? The possibilities abound.

Effective immediately: foosball tables will be placed in every break room on every floor. All Year End Parties will be canceled until the company is back on the track of significant profitability and shareholder value.

When asked about the traditional Yahoo! yodel, WebMocha co-founder Barney Mok said, “Yeah…that’s gotta go. We’re bringing back the Arsenio Hall fist pump to instill fear in our competition.”

About WebMocha LLC

WebMocha LLC is a California-based web development and technology services company that builds optimized, high-performance, enterprise-level web applications.

Contact:

WebMocha LLC
Hiro Nakamura, 415-555-4180 (Media Relations)
motryingtopeekhuhc.ahcombewwhatareyoudoinghal@orih

About Yahoo!

Yahoo! Inc. is a leading global Internet brand and one of the most trafficked Internet destinations worldwide. Yahoo! is focused on powering its communities of users, advertisers, publishers, and developers by creating indispensable experiences built on trust. Yahoo! is headquartered in Sunnyvale, California.

Contact:

Yahoo! Inc.
David Yang, 408-555-7426 (Media Relations)
yangmeister@yahoo-inc.com
Jerry Filo, 408-555-4110 (Investor Relations)
f@yahoo-inc.com

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April Fools, obviously.

Author: Mike Lee

An idealistic realist, humanistic technologist & constant student.