Category: Psychology

Do Your Homework Whenever Meeting Someone New

Admit it, you’ve Googled someone before. Maybe it was someone you were dating. Maybe it was someone you had a crush on.

But how about when you have a sales meeting and are about to meet a new prospective client?

If you are an experienced salesperson, I’m probably preaching to the choir. For those like me who are in the consulting & services business and relatively new to the sales role, I have this to say:

Do your homework whenever you meet someone new.

This applies all around the sales cycle. From following up on leads to meeting other stakeholders to getting their team introduced with yours. Throughout this process, you are likely to meet several different people (or one person fulfilling all of these roles):

  • Primary stakeholder – the person with the budget
  • Influencers – other stakeholders who have a say in this decision
  • Project manager – the person who coordinates the work between your client and your team, also often the main point of contact
  • Workers – employees from your client’s team with whom your team will have to interact

Do your homework on each of them. For a service organization, all the members of your client’s team are important and critical to your success.

Why?

The goal isn’t to stalk the person. It’s to find meaningful connections. If the person likes the San Francisco Giants, and hey, so do you, then bring it up. If you’re not a fan, then keep your mouth shut. Don’t be insincere with these connections. Use them only if they honestly exist. Otherwise, you might find yourself in a TV sitcom where you’re trying to lie and squirm your way out of a totally alien discussion. And all without a laugh track.

If there are no connections, consider identifying a key achievement that person has made and offering congratulations. Perhaps the person started a company that launched a successful product in the past. Perhaps the person wrote a book or article you’ve read. Again, don’t be overtly insincere, though a little flattery can get you a long way.

It also helps to understand the person’s background. If he/she comes from a technical background, then you can tailor your sales pitch to a more technical audience. If he/she comes from a marketing background, then emphasize potential branding and identity benefits. Use key terminology from their background.

So far, I haven’t had a case where a person has been offended or frightened by this research. In fact, many seem to be flattered by it, even expect it. Some don’t care though; they’re more interested in the deal and how it can help them.

All of this assumes you’ve already done your homework with the company, their department, and their needs. Don’t even bother researching the people if you haven’t researched their business.

Ultimately, you want to form a connection with these stakeholders. If they feel they can relate to you on a personal level, and they feel you can sincerely understand them on a professional & personal level, then they are more likely to sign a contract with you.

How?

Here’s what I do:

  1. Google (GOOG) – I start with a good, old-fashioned Google search. This usually gives me most of the information I need, such as links to a blog, Twitter account, resume, etc.

    I always start with the blog, if one exists. This gives me a good overview of the person and his/her personality & interests. Does the person have a sarcastic sense of humor? A dry wit? Does the person have any hobbies or interests with which I can relate? Has this person done anything notable that I want to call out?

  2. LinkedIn.com – If the previous search doesn’t turn up a LinkedIn profile, then I perform one specifically on this site. Most people in my industry have a LinkedIn account.

    This gives me an overview of the person’s education and career path, which tells me the language he/she speaks (technical, marketing, design, financial, etc) and how I should tailor my sales pitch.

  3. Others – I know some salespeople go further and check out Facebook, MySpace, and other similar sources. Personally, I don’t. If you aren’t a member of that person’s Facebook network, then you won’t be able to see deeper details. Also, the interests and photos included on Facebook don’t help as much as a blog or personal website. It’s tough to form a connection on a favorite TV show, especially if you don’t know how much they like it, or if their profile has been updated recently. My experience, anyways; some still do this research all the time. And practically no one in my industry uses MySpace (that I know of).

Once you have this information, share it with your team. Help them to understand the client better. This can strengthen the relationship on both sides.

There will be a few cases where such web research doesn’t help because the person keeps a private offline life. That’s fine. That’s where you’ll need to muster up your interpersonal skills and form a connection the old fashioned way. These tips just offer an extra advantage. If the information is out there, why not use it, right?

Photo by: fazen

Reading True North: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise

What is your greatest crucible? The third chapter of True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership explores the experiences that involved the greatest pressure, stress, and adversity in one’s life. Here is the exercise that follows that chapter.

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

Write freely about your greatest crucible and describe it in the following ways:

  • How did you feel at the time?
  • What resources did you call upon?
  • How did you resolve the issues, if you have?
  • How did it shape you and your views about the world?

It’s tough to choose just one experience as my greatest crucible. There have been many difficult experiences that altered my life. Here is one that comes to mind.

Back at Yahoo! (YHOO), I was given the honor of managing a large group of talented web developers. However, the team grew quite large, larger than my experience could handle at that time.

In one incident, a few members of my team helped launch a redesign of a major Yahoo! property. Unfortunately, this redesign was plagued with some troublesome bugs, a few of which were my team’s responsibility. Those few, unfortunately, were high-profile showstoppers and took a long time to fix. Too long. Soon, the bugs caught the attention of a VP, who sat me down to talk.

I still remember sitting there with a huge knot in my throat, trying to explain how the errors occurred. Fortunately, my team finally fixed them. But the VP did not see this as a sufficient solution. He saw a break in communications and our organizational structure that exacerbated the problem more than it should have been.

I also remember saying the words, “This is ultimately my responsibility and I take the blame. I will continue working with our teams to come up with a better solution.” And I think I might have even uttered the words, “I fucked up” in there too.

My face was red and hot. I thought that was the end of my career at Yahoo!. I imagined getting a call from HR and being shown the door. Part of the problem was that I didn’t catch this issue sooner, and I didn’t do that because I was overwhelmed by a large team. I knew that, and so did the VP.

Eventually, a long-term solution was implemented. There was a reorganization of my department. The incident wasn’t solely in my team, it was endemic to my department and the nature of our relationship to other teams at the company. While the reorg was a bummer to many, and resulted in a smaller, more focused team for me, it made sense from an organizational standpoint.

The VP didn’t blacklist me or have me fired. The incident taught me to be cognizant of my strengths and weaknesses, to balance my stretch goals with my abilities, and to think holistically from an organizational standpoint. As a crucible, it was damn tough – it was one I will never forget.

Describe any relationships, such as those with mentors, that had a transformative effect on you and your leadership. What did you learn from that relationship and how did it shape who you are?

I’ve never had a formal mentor, though I’ve always wanted one. In lieu of that, I’ve always looked at people that inspired me and emulated their effective traits.

Throughout my career, I’ve been lucky to have lots of great managers. Each excelled in some way. One is a technical genius with fantastic foresight into the high-tech industry, another is relentlessly customer-focused and data-driven, and another knew how to play the game of office politics well (I wish this knowledge wasn’t necessary or useful, but in large corporations, it sadly is).

Each has enhanced my world view and repetiore of skills. I can’t say I replicate them as well as these managers do, but I strive to. Each also challenged me, both directly and indirectly, to stretch past my comfort zones and evolve my skills. For that, I am eternally indebted to these inspiring individuals.

Describe any other experiences that triggered significant leadership development.

I’m guessing this question is seeking more crucible-like experiences, so let me this other incident:

While serving as the president of a cultural community service club in college, I was responsible for a street carnival. Unfortunately, I overslept that day. Since I’ve already written about it, I won’t go over all of the details. But it was definitely a harsh learning opportunity.

All in all, I would say I’ve had a lucky life. Now that I’ve formally started a profitable business of my own, I expect to face more crucibles. And I look forward to them.

In looking back on those experiences, what did you learn from them?

The debacle in college taught me to delegate properly, have faith in my delegates, and to make sure I get a good night’s rest before a big event.

In what ways have they helped you to grow?

They’ve all stretched me and taught me management skills. Be aware of the whole situation. Understand our dependencies and consequences. And like the Boy Scouts, Be Prepared.

How can you use these experiences to reframe your life story and to understand yourself and your life more fully? Are there ways in which these experiences are holding you back today?

One pattern I’ve noticed in my life is the constant push outside my comfort zones. I am and have always been an ambitious and demanding person. I always strive for personal success and demand a lot out of myself. Because of this, I frequently push myself outside my comfort – and ability – zones.

So when I fall far outside of my abilities, the consequences can have quite an impact.

Don’t get me wrong. Mistakes are good. Mistakes are fantastic learning opportunities. I celebrate a culture that allows experimentation, self-improvement, and forgiveness of mistakes.

However, there’s a practical limit to how disastrous a mistake can be. If it kills your organization, lands you in a lawsuit, and ends your marriage, that’s not a good kind of mistake. So as I continue to push myself, I will need to be mindful of my abilities’ limits.

Transformation from “I” to “We.”

Are you on “the hero’s journey”? Do you ever see yourself as the hero of your own journey?

I’ve always felt myself on a journey. The destination is surprisingly clear too, though I know I have to work hard for it – to be a good father and husband, to be an entrepreneur and business owner, to enact some kind of long-lasting beneficial change to my society and environment, and to leave a legacy.

However, I wouldn’t use the label “hero” for myself. That’s a little much. I see myself more as a catalyst that enables others to help make the vision a reality.

Though, I’d sure love to be a hero to my kids one day.

Have you made the transformation from “I” to “We”? If so, what triggered this transformation for you?

I like to think I have. In Stephen Covey’s book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People“, he describes three sequential phases of growth:

  1. Dependence – We all start life being dependent on someone else, like our parents. Some remain at this level their whole lives.
  2. Independence – Many strive for this level. For some, this means self-reliance. For others, it means being a loner.
  3. Interdependence – Few reach this level. This is when you realize and behave as if the sum of two or more people (such as a spouse, teammates, etc) is greater than the parts.

While being a manager, I learned the power of interdependence. That may seem odd, since one view of a manager is as an autocratic entity working alone to control others. But that’s not always so. My management philosophy means working closely with my team and, in many ways, letting them lead the way with me in a supporting role – a catalyst for their ideas.

If you have not yet made this transformation, what would have to happen in your life and leadership for a transformation like this to occur?

I would say I’ve made that transformation already.

How would you answer these questions?

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

On Failure

And Down She Goes!

“If we’re not failing at something on a regular basis, we’re just not trying hard enough.”
– Stephen Kaufer

As an entrepreneur, failure is a certainty, success is not.

It’s a fact that more small businesses fail than succeed. The exact percentage of failures to successes changes depending on who you ask, but that’s the general trend.

So as an entrepreneur, you need to be comfortable with failure. You need to embrace it. Plan for it. And when it happens, learn from it and move on.

If you want to be truly innovative, you’ll have to be especially comfortable with failure. Innovation means pushing the boundaries and doing something daring, something most people are going to call you crazy for doing. And chances are, most of the things you’ll do will be crazy. They’ll fail wonderfully in a ball of fire.

In other words, to be an entrepreneur (and to be innovative), you need to fail many more times than you’ll succeed.

Those who aren’t able to handle failure are better suited for a less risky lifestyle – though I’d argue that working for someone else isn’t less risky in actuality, it’s just less taxing mentally and less ambiguous.

We’re all wired to be risk averse to a certain extent. It hurts more to lose $100 than to gain $100, for instance. But it’s possible to flip that around when you’re an entrepreneur.

Failing sucks. Don’t get me wrong. There’s always a bit of a sting when something you’ve been pouring your heart & soul into fails. But the trick is to rebound quickly, assess why you failed rationally, and jump into your next plan eagerly.

The assessment part is important. This is where you learn from your mistakes. You can read all you want, attend all the conferences you can afford, and talk to all the advisors you can, but experience will still be your best teacher. Of course, you can decrease your failure rate a bit if you arm yourself with good information. However, when it comes time to make a quick & decisive decision, that’s where your experiences weighs heavily.

So you still want to be an entrepreneur? Go out there and fail. Then fail again. Then pick yourself up and with you’ve learned, go create a kick ass company.

Pyramid Scheme Scamming in Bookstores

It almost happened again.

“Good evening,” the gentleman in the hat said.

“Evening,” I muttered with nary a glance in his direction.

“You have your own business?” he asked.

“Nah. Just looking for a gift for a friend,” I replied. Then I walked out of the business book section.

Years ago, a seemingly nice guy struck up a conversation with me while I was browsing through the business book section. Not wanting to be inhospitable, and always eager to expand my business network, I chatted with him about my dreams of entrepreneurship.

I did occasional freelance web development work back then. He said he had his own business and needed a new website. So I gave him my card.

He set up a meeting to discuss his website. When we met a week later, he pitched me a dizzying business model of soliciting friends and helping them set up their own business too, just like he was going to help me do. No talk of a new website at all.

As soon as he sketched out a bunch of boxes on a napkin that vaguely resembled a pyramid, I stopped the conversation. “Look, I know what you’re trying to pitch me. You’re trying to pitch me a pyramid scheme.”

He looked at me incredulously. “What?! This is not a pyramid scheme!”

I thanked him for the coffee, got up, and walked out. As I left, I noticed a gentleman in a suit sitting a few tables over. He glanced at me, then turned away immediately. It was too late. I recognized him. He had been in the bookstore when I first met the pyramid scheme guy. He was even wearing a suit back then, which was why I recognized him. (A guy wearing a suit in Silicon Valley sticks out like a sore thumb, lemme just tell ya.) Mr. Suit had been standing behind me while I was talking to Mr. Pyramid Scheme at that bookstore.

This time around, I glanced around the business book section as I walked out. There was an older gentleman standing near the gentleman in the hat.

A case of a master and an apprentice? Do they always work in pairs? Or just a mere coincidence?

It’s entirely possible I am wrong about the gentleman in the hat. He could have been just a friendly guy wanting to chat.

In my experience, however, only salespeople attempt cold leads like that. It’s like cold calling, except in a bookstore. In fact, it’s pretty smart of them to prey on readers perusing business books. They’re targeting people with a potential entrepreneurial streak. And with the lure of easy money being strong – especially in an economy like this – I wonder how many bites they get.

This has even happened to me on the plane. That’s another smart spot for them to target. They have a captive audience. On some flights, the chances of its passengers being there for business is high. So I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s another target zone.

I could be wrong, but my gut sensed something fishy at the bookstore that night. If I lost out on a potential legitimate business connection, oh well. I’d rather make my connections through other means than to waste my time being sold another pyramid scheme. Life is too short to waste time like this.

Has this ever happened to you?

Photo by: goose3five

Reading True North: Losing Your Way Exercise

Do you know any leaders who were once great, but lost their way? That is the central theme behind the second chapter of True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership. Here is the exercise that follows that chapter.

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

Why Leaders Lose Their Way

Have you seen leaders lose their way or worked with someone who fits any of the archetypes particularly well?

Yup. Countless times. I’ve heard of many political leaders rise to power through the support of their people, only to fall to corruption and become overthrown by those same people.

Thinking about this brings to mind the theory that people are promoted to the point of incompetence. The theory describes people that are promoted because they’re doing a great job in their current role, without regard for how well they’ll do in the next level.

What are the behaviors and warning signals you have seen in others at risk of losing their way?

Arrogance is perhaps the main warning sign I’ve seen. They become enamored with themselves and believe they are incapable of doing no wrong. Some go as far as to surround themselves, consciously or unconsciously, with Yes People too. ‘Tis quite a shame.

Derailment

Can you see any of the qualities of the Imposter in yourself?

Note: An Imposter is someone who rises through the organizational ranks with a combination of cunning and aggression. They understand the politics of getting ahead and let no one stand in their way.

Nope. I believe people should rise based on proven merit and potential aptitude for the next role ahead. I was once given the opportunity for a promotion, but turned it down because I knew I wasn’t ready yet and another person would fit the role better.

Can you see any of the qualities of the Rationalizer in yourself?

Note: A Rationalizer is someone who always appears on top of the issues, yet when things don’t go his/her way, he/she blames external forces or subordinates or offer facile answers to his/her problems.

Nope. It’s important to know the root causes of problems, especially when it’s yourself. Without such impartial self-awareness, it’s impossible to improve.

Can you see any of the qualities of the Glory Seeker in yourself?

Note: A Glory Seeker is someone who defines himself/herself by acclaim of the external world. Money, fame, glory, and power are his/her goals, as he/she pursues visible signs of success.

There may be a bit of this in me. Anyone who has a blog is seeking some measure of fame. If someone says otherwise, that person doesn’t understand the nature of a blog.

I don’t want to be a celebrity though. That kind of lifestyle is not for me. But I wouldn’t mind a room in a library named after me – after I’ve made a substantial difference to that community, of course. I’ll happily accept recognition if I earn it, but will never put my kids in a balloon (or not) just to get some fame.

Can you see any of the qualities of the Loner in yourself?

Note: A Loner is someone who avoids forming close relationships, seeking out mentors, or creating support networks. They believe they can and must make it on their own.

Nope. Nothing pumps me up more than to meet with people smarter than I and listen to their advice. One of my roles in life is as a constant student. In that role, I am always learning. Everyone around me is a teacher. There is something I can learn from everyone, if I listen carefully and keep an open mind.

Can you see any of the qualities of the Shooting Star in yourself?

Note: A Shooting Star is someone whose life centers entirely on his/her career. He/she is always on the go, rarely making time for family, friendships, his/her community, or even himself/herself.

Nope. My family is the most important thing in my life. I’m doing all of this for my family, after all. I’ll never compromise my time with my family.

Losing Your Way

Can you envision a situation in which you could lose your way in the future?

It’s difficult to envision that, though anything is possible. Of the derailment roles listed above, I suppose the one that holds the most risk for me is the Glory Seeker. I like to think that I’m grounded enough to never pursue fame over my family or business though. That just sounds insane.

To what extent are you prepared to go your own way and be your own person, despite external pressure?

I’m prepared all the way man! The path of an entrepreneur is full of external pressures. It’s our job to balance them and make intelligent trade-offs.

Do you have a fear of failing? In what ways? Is it because you are afraid of what other people would think about you? Is it personal pride?

No, I’m not afraid of failing. I rather welcome it. I expect to fail many times before I succeed.

That’s not to say I will be a failure. I am just realistic about the life of an entrepreneur and have my expectations set accordingly. Failure is really an opportunity to learn. Therefore, I welcome failure and look forward to the education it will impart to make me a better entrepreneur, leader, father, and person.

How is your fear of failing impacting your decisions about leadership and your career? Are you consciously or unconsciously avoiding situations in which there is a risk of failure?

I suppose I don’t need to answer this question if I’m not afraid of failing. To failure, I have this to say: In the words of Joe XXX, “Bring it on!”

How could the experience of failing help you achieve your ultimate goals?

I just wrote about this above. Failure is really an opportunity to learn. The more I learn, the easier it is, and closer I get to my ultimate goals.

In what ways do you crave success?

I crave success in myself, with my family, in my business, and in my community. The answers are broad because the vision for each is broad.

In myself, success means maturity, health, happiness, rewarding challenges, and peaceful contentment. With my family, I want the same as I want in myself, such as a healthy & happy family. In my business, success means self-sustaining profitability, the betterment of the lives of our customers, and a happy & rewarding place to work for my employees. In my community, it means some kind of improvement in the lives of my neighbors and community members.

How is your craving for success impacting your decisions about leadership and your career? Are you consciously or unconsciously choosing situations that give you a high probability of success?

My desire for succeeding in my life goals has a strong and conscious influence over the choices I make. The positions and roles I’ve held have all been a conscious stepping stone towards entrepreneurship, for example. This career in the web and the flexibility it offers was also a conscious decision, so that I could work from home often and spend more time with my family.

How would you answer these questions?

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

Reading True North: Your Story Exercise

What’s your story? That is the question covered by the first chapter of True North: Discover Your Authentic Leadership. I’m covering each of the exercises that follow the chapters of this book.

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

Discover Your Leadership in Your Life Story

During your early years, which people had the greatest impact on you?

My parents and teachers had the greatest impact on me. Both of my parents are in leadership positions, though each varies significantly in leadership style. Their range has taught me to consider a range of techniques for any given situation.

A handful of teachers also made an impression, such as my fifth-grade teacher and her weekly Poor Richard’s Almanac quotes (“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”, “A penny saved is a penny earned”, “In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes”, etc). I love quotes, those little nuggets of wisdom. Perhaps that love originated from fifth-grade.

Starting with your earliest memories, which experiences marked turning points in his life?

There were many. First, I was a quiet, introverted kid. Then a series of fortunate events evolved me into, surprisingly, an extrovert. The change has been so striking that I sometimes wonder if my true nature is to be an extrovert and my childhood environment nudged me into being an introvert. (Not that there’s anything wrong with being an introvert. Extroversion and introversion are merely where you get your energy and place your attention – from other people or from yourself.)

Once that foundation was set, my first true taste of leadership came in college. In my junior year, I became the public relations officer of a student-run community service organization. Then its president in my senior year. Leading a team of intelligent type-A officers and student volunteers like myself was a remarkable experience. I had to learn how to deal with my weaknesses, hone my strengths, delegate, communicate effectively, motivate officers and volunteers already swamped with school work, coordinate social events, and grow the organization.

The next turning point was becoming an engineering manager at Yahoo! (YHOO). At the peak of this role, I managed a small organization of 22 developers and first-line managers. The experience allowed me to hone a set of management techniques & principles that have become my management style.

The latest turning point has been launching WebMocha, where my leadership role evolved from leading teams to leading a company with business partners. In this role, I was fortunate to find partners who complemented my strengths and weaknesses, and I theirs. A whole new set of leadership behaviors had to be refined here, such as managing workers, dealing with client projects, winning the hearts and minds of prospective clients, managing finances, working towards profitability, etc.

There was also another significant turning point – a nearly fatal accident while skydiving. That profound experience taught me to appreciate life and view it graciously. It’s also made me realize the importance of being myself, of being authentic. Because when I’m on my death bed, what do I want to be proud of: having lived my life as someone else or having lived my life as myself?

In which experiences did you find the greatest inspiration and passion for leadership?

Any instance where someone in my team achieved greatness, success, recognition, or reached his/her own goals has been inspirational. I was fortunate enough to experience this over and over again while at Yahoo! The high I received was way better than any drug, lemme tell ya.

Looking at patterns from your early life story, what people, events and experiences have had the greatest impact on you and your life?

These questions are a bit redundant, huh? My parents and teachers had a significant impact on me. As did the events I described in the last two questions.

Can you identify instances where you were dissatisfied with your leadership or received constructive feedback from others about it?

There are a few poignant moments at Yahoo! that I regret. Having 22 members meant being responsible for evaluating the performance of many direct reports. That was more than I could handle. Arguably, it’s more than anyone could handle. As a result, some of the members I didn’t know as well didn’t get fair & accurate performance evaluations.

In one case, I had a developer with great potential, provided he had the proper guidance. Unfortunately, there were too many other priorities at the time. When review time came, he was dissatisfied with his evaluation and didn’t feel like he was working to the best of his capabilities – which was absolutely true. He ended up leaving my team and becoming a senior developer on another team. Thankfully, he was able to reach his true potential there, unlike in my team, where I feel like I failed him.

Has there been an instance in your life where you felt like a victim?

Nope. I’ve always felt that I have control over my life. The bad situations I’ve gotten into are my fault, and it’s my fault if I don’t learn from them.

Do the failures or disappointments you experienced earlier in your life constrain you, even today, or have you been able to reframe them as learning experiences?

They are definitely learning experiences. Fantastic learning experiences too. While some past experiences were very unpleasant, they’ve made me who I am today and I’m happy with who I am today. After all, “we remember some of what we are told, a little more of what we read, and almost all of what we experience.”

The Journey to Authentic Leadership

Do you currently view your life and leadership as a destination to a certain point or as a journey in which you seek to maximize your learning and experiences?

Life is always a journey. If you reach a goal or destination, then it’s time to set another goal and return to the journey.

The journey can be made much easier if you learn from previous mistakes. Otherwise, you’re doomed to repeat them. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like repeating dumb mistakes over and over again.

What are the most significant leadership experiences you have had to date and what did you learn from them?

The major life turning points I wrote about above are also some of the most significant leadership experiences I’ve had so far. From becoming the president of a student-run community service organization in college, to an engineering manager at Yahoo!, then to the principal of WebMocha, I’ve learned a lot from these wonderful experiences, which I’ve written above too. Cheers to redundant questions.

What experiences do you need to develop your leadership to take it to the next level?

The next step in my leadership education is becoming a successful entrepreneur. Fortunately, I’m already on this path with WebMocha.

If you are just entering a new phase, have you assessed the goals and experiences you would like to have during the phase?

Yes. My goals are sustainable profitability and growth from WebMocha. The experiences I’m going to learn from this journey will be invaluable.

Do you think you need to make any adjustments to your personal and leadership development as a result? If so, what are they?

I will definitely need to make adjustments. My leadership experience has been mainly people-based, as opposed to business-based. While managing a business shares many of the qualities needed to manage people and teams, there are also notable differences too. This is what I will need to learn.

This will include greater reliability on intelligence business managers & leaders in my social network for wisdom & advice. I am fortunate to have a good and varied network. As my schedule eases up, I look forward to meeting with each of them regularly.

How can you take your previous experiences and apply them more optimally to your leadership now?

The failures I’ve had will be an important lesson in the future. I know that being an entrepreneur is difficult and fraught with challenges. Failure is a certainy. Success isn’t.

How would you answer these questions?

The True North exercises:

  • Introduction Exercise
  • Chapter 1: Your Story Exercise
  • Chapter 2: Losing Your Way Exercise
  • Chapter 3: Your Greatest Crucible Exercise
  • Chapter 4: Knowing Your Authentic Self Exercise
  • Chapter 5: Practicing Your Values and Principles Exercise
  • Chapter 6: Your Motivations and Motivated Capabilities Exercise
  • Chapter 7: Building Your Support Team Exercise
  • Chapter 8: The Integrated Leader Exercise
  • Chapter 9: The Purpose of My Leadership Exercise
  • Chapter 10: Empowering Other Leaders Exercise
  • Chapter 11: Honing Your Leadership Effectiveness Exercise

What We Are Told, What We Read, What We Experience

For the life of me, I can’t remember who said this line:

We remember some of what we are told, a little more of what we read, and almost all of what we experience.

I don’t even remember the exact phrasing of that line. Instead of “some,” “a little more,” and “almost all,” it might have been percentages like: 25%, 50% and 100%.

It’s a good quote. At least, the sentiment behind it is sound. Everyone learns differently, but at the core, we all learn best by doing.

And sometimes, by doing and failing – because nothing is a better teacher than the harsh burn of a mistake.

I want to say Jack Welch said this line, but I can’t find a reference to it anywhere. Does this line sound familiar to you? Know what the exact wording is, or who said it?

The Business Benefits of Lateral Thinking

If I hear “think outside the box” one more time, I’m going to beat my head with a box. With that said, you can give yourself tremendous advantages if you employ lateral thinking. A common business buzzword for lateral thinking is thinking outside the… you know the rest.

Lateral thinking is “the solution of problems through an indirect and creative approach.” At it’s most basic level, lateral thinking is like looking at something at a different angle. With the screen up, your laptop proudly displays this web page. If you close your laptop, you can appreciate it’s slim design. Look even closer and you can see the vent, screws, and various ports.

Here’s an example of how it helps with problem solving:

Say you’re building a new house. Someone just asked you to make the living room brighter. What do you do?

A common answer is to add more windows. Or expand the size of the current windows. That’s nice and straight-forward thinking.

However, if you were to employ some lateral thinking, and no doubt some of you already have, you might come up with answers such as:

  • Paint the rooms white.
  • Put in a sky light.
  • Put mirrors in the room.
  • Add lots of recessed lighting in the ceiling.
  • Change the placement of the room so it faces the direction with the most sunlight.
  • Set the room on fire (that’ll sure make it bright, and hot!)

If you sat down and really thought about it, I’m sure you could add more to that list. The primary mental activity is looking at the question in a different way, a different angle. Reframing it, so to speak. Instead of viewing it from a carpenter’s perspective, you could answer it from an electrician’s perspective. Or a firefighter’s perspective. Or a young child’s perspective. All of these could give you distinctly different answers. That’s lateral thinking.

How can this help your business? It can help with brainstorming business ideas, whether they be new features, new products, new services, or enhancements on current offerings. It can help with your marketing campaign, especially in social media and viral marketing, where clever and creative hooks can expand your reach exponentially.

It can help with your operations too. Take a look at your current distribution system. Or product development process. Or accounting system. Look at it from someone else’s perspective. Are there ways to improve those processes? If you tore down all preconceptions and assumptions, are there new alternatives you hadn’t considered before?

So don’t forgot to think outside… I mean, think laterally. Employ lateral thinking. It will expand not only your business, but your mind.

Photo by: Dan Morelle